Lessons of Love.

Old School Lloyd!!

Today was emotional in some ways.  Has anyone had the feeling like their life it literally out of their control?  Or even in deeper terms getting out of control?  Kind of had this aura around our life on today...just when so much weird stuff, from life to girls to how people treat or look at u in some ways...It can be just a little too much.  We are probably one of the most self-motivated people in the galaxia, but sometimes u feel like u're the only one who believes ur as special as u might be.  I'll go to my grave saying this, "just because a beautiful girl, knows she's beautiful, doesn't mean she doesn't wanna still hear it every once in awhile."... (how's a girl wearing a Lebron tee shirt in the front row, and not clap after he makes a great move?!!)...see...I gotta write this thang for real tonite, once again, it's a diary, and I want this thang to be unlike anything anyone has/is/will ever read in the public forum as someone is on a journey to the "top"....

As I was saying, with the Lebron thing...this is what I'm talking about, the underappreciation of history or should I say something (one) u may never see again.  That's not a conceited statement, it's true!  All, and I do mean ALL of us are special in one form or anoth...for instance, today's V-Day, if u've been reading our diary, u know I believe in Love everyday, and not to be Copperfielding all this money for just one day.  YET, I do understand it does mean something, so as I was saying, I'm sure someone is all geeked up for a special evening only to find that their mate forgot about the day or is too busy watching the Heat game, while the candle is lit...taking things and life for granted, don't do that...this stuff is starting to hit us right now, so bear with us...so as some single may be at the spot, chllin' and reading this entry, he or she might be like, why can't I find that special someone?  Why do I keep getting turned down when I ask somebody out?  Or why won't anybody have the gall to ask me out when I'm more beautiful than these other chicks?  Or how come everytime I find somebody, it starts out toward a future honeymoon, and then like always, turns sour?  These are legitmate questions to ask for some, heck, even myself, so let's share a little bit...

What we, (my hand is up!), have to realize is how everything can change in a blink of an eye.  I think one way is to not get jealous of other people's lives.  For one, u just never know what goes on behind closed doors.  (Thanks Grandpa!)  And for another, u just might be, u ARE the next one in line to get urs.  Hit me Tyrese...if I can survive all this stuff of having so...a lot of...not about me right now, but if I can survive all this Melrose Place slash Days of our Lives guitar player for Guns 'n Roses freakin' Sunset Beach type drama in our life then anybody can.  One breakup does not mean u're not a beautiful person, nor does one hookup mean ur the sexiest thing in the galaxy....that's actually me!!  just kidding!...but that's true.  U go to the bar, I'm gonna tell this thang, go to the bar and u standing by the digital jukebox (those things are so sexy aren't they!) and no one asks u to dance or for a drink or for a date...the next week u still stand by the same juke box, and yet it seems like everybody is on you for this or that, and u're basically dressed the same and what have you...does this actually make u more beautiful one week to the next?  Humm...which leads to...

Timing...it's absolutely everything in life, and especially love.  From bumping shopping carts with someone at the grocery store...man, this one time, I bumped into this angel over by the frozen food section (it always happens over there doesn't it??) at the Publix on West Ave. whew wee!  I thought it was a sign from God really, but anyway...timing can be in that realm all the way to missing a flight and u have to take the next flight, only to find ur now flying away with special somebody.  All because of ....timing.  That's my thing, trying to force timing u know.  It's like being posted near the women's bathroom at a disco-teca, guys don't do that, for one when they come out of there, they don't immediately wanna be approached.  And for two, the prettiest girls do-do brown smells the worst!  (that's a little insight from the modeling agency world! )

I'm looking at this Heat game (vs. Pacers) and what I'm noticing is that they are playing without looking at the score...ah yes!!...they're up by like 24 points...right on time, cuz I think in life, and especially when it comes to love, we have to live like we don't know what the score is.  I didn't say live like we don't know how much time is on the clock (that's deep!), I say like we don't know what the score is...so if u're down by 30 (i.e.- every relationship has been the pits with cheating, lies, and Ray J videotapes), we have to keep going as if that doesn't affect our present mindset...I have a story to tell...again...

This stuff opens us up in some wild ways, but I feel like the stories can help somebody overcome...I really had an eye on this one girl, and ended up, I don't know how to put this...attempting to win her heart, how about that...told folks about her this and that...here's a side quip, if we ask u out u must be special, cuz I just don't...ah...Ne-Yo can say it better...but after all this and that, she basically said that I was harassing her and all this...and u talking about my heart being broken down.  It totally came outta left field that she thought this way.  And for her to tell me to my face this stuff, as she was accepting our "Magic Johnson's" on a daily basis with a smile.  I was hurt.  And because of that I literally took like, let me see.... at least 8 months off from really even opening up myself to another girl.  I was so traumatized over this episode, I didn't even know all that time has passed.  One day, it hit us like, dude we haven't approached a girl in a minute, like since this forget-a-sode the chickenhe...bit...tram...girl.  All the while, all these other girls we're open, flirting and touching us, showing signs of promise rings yet I was mentally and spiritually so broken up by the past that I may have missed out on some mad cool chicks.  All on the premise, that I was hurt once, I was hurt very bad, so I won't be hurt again.  I played while looking at the score...I won't do that again.

On that same token, we have to be open...just because an Hispanic girl, with long hair, who rocks an Opening Cermony top with some Paper Denim and Cloth jeans and a scarf, did u wrong, doesn't mean u should take it out on the next person who has a similar look or style.  "Oh, we kissed on the first date...so did my last ex, look how that turned out, this is gonna be the same..."  or "On my last birthday, my ex-girlfriend bought me a Carmelo jersey, now this year this new doll did the same...this must be an omen to take her to Olive Garden for that pasta-salad-breadsticks special, tell her I have to go to the bathroom and then honey dip out the window!"...No!!!!  That might mean u have some girls who recognize ur style and favorite player...and the reason u have an "ex" is because u kept comparing her measurements...i.q....sense of style...and if she snores or not, with every other girl u've had in the past!!  I speak because I know...

It's wild out here, and everything isn't what it seems.  Some of these stories, some folk like to keep up drama, just on gp.  It keeps the relationship interesting...so let me get this right, having u G.I. Joe ur way around the neighborhood to get with a best friend makes the relationship interesting...or taking a guy out to dinner, knowing it never had a chance in the first place, but u wanted to try out the hottest restaurant, keeps things interesting.  How about...sending roses when she or even HE least expects it....or picking somebody up from work instead of having them suffer through a 5 o'clock bus ride....or taking a picture with rockin' nothing but ur mates favorite jersey...or calling just 2 say "I simply wanted to hear your voice", instead of texting all the dag gone time...all these things add spice to a relationship...and then some.

I'm done.  But I just hope, we...when I write I'm talking to myself a lot of the time, cuz I know and have learned some very hard lessons on love...It'll be alright...have a feeling our tomorrow is gonna be better than today.

I just feel it in tha air...

C'mon Lloyd give us a lesson on love...

Air Smooches.
Austino Galaxia.