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| KISS...Keep It Simple Sir or Stupid...Oh, & tha band was good too!! |
Simplicity.
I'm laughing cuz we had/have no idea what to write or where this diary is going today, but that word jumps out.
Oh, how we wish life was just so simple? Like, why can't u park ur car in a Wal-mart parking lot without having somebody nestled up to u right in the spot next to you? Dude...I parked 300 feet by myself for a reason, now we look like the only couple smooching at a singles bar! Or how come when u get a coupon for 20% extra, the exclude like all the good stuff, and the only things u can buy is like a freakin' 8-track player and a keychain...Or how come all those "right now" deals u find on Groupon, sell out so fast, when it seems like u just got on, and nobody could be possibly shopping at 4am in the morning can they?!! Life as we are finding out just isn't so simple. But we striving it to be...
Our personality is still one that desires fun to happen, and for it to happen right now. I try to live a simple life. U know...the kind where u have a flat screen TV but with no cable...or the kind where u go to Target and buy a certain flavor of deodorant that u don't really want, but since u can get 15% extra roll-on for the same price as the others, u go around smelling like a dozen roses all day! I know I'm crazy, or "weird" but when so much is going on around our life, we try to do what we can to simplify our life. That might mean using one scoop of sweet relish (No Sugar Added of course!), on ur pasta instead of two cuz u know that BOGO sale ain't coming around for another 3 weeks...or while taking a shower, using the soap til the last slither...Has anyone else had a bar of soap break while they are in the shower, and are in the 2nd chorus of Christina Aguilera's "Genie In A Bottle", only to have ur soap break in half! U look around, and as u shout out, "If u wanna be with me....", u look around scoop up both of the halves, stack them Marcus Burnett and Mike Lowery's right on top of each other, and u back to scrubbing ur belly button hairs!
Simple is just so complex...as I say that in our whining 1st grader voice....It can makes folks throw things across the room...It leads people to begin the conversation with that, "U know..."...Listen up, right when u hear those two syllables look out, cuz the following is about to come next. Either:
a) "...I like u and all...but..." (Total rejection, give it up like Marvin Gaye, dude cuz it's over!)
b) "...I've been thinking...." (That could actually be good or bad)
c) "...I just have such a boring life." (Better step in on that one!)
d) "...I caught u with..." (I hope u have a bulletproof vest on under ur blue Gap dress shirt for that bro!")
But whenever our lives get kinda of complex when we think it's totally unnecessary. We can flip out...internally and externally. It's almost like going to kick it or whatever. Guys (and Girls) what's one of the key factors to a night out. And no, it's not deciding who's birthday it is, so the whole night can be on tha "house"!!...But ur close....Where to eat?!! Ding, ding, ding! Now this "simple" decision can sometimes ruin a night. Am I lying on this? U begin to think away from the "I'm just hungry and I just wanna go somewhere where the cooks know how to boil water and the waitresses won't spilled my food"....and u get into that "I wonder if this cow was grass fed or not? And into that 'I wonder if they sell my drink, u know Apple Martini's go best with my skin when I wear this outfit'!!"
U begin to decide who's going with you, the situation like if it's guy's night out...u gotta go to where the food is legit, the waitresses are the hottest and ...did I just say that? Anyway, and where u don't have to pay for parking. If u're on a date or with a significant other of another sex, then u try to consider there preferences, even though u're trying to hit up the joint between 5pm and 6pm cuz that's when ur food is the price of the time that u ordered it. So when something comes up, and u get that call, "I'm only available after 10pm." U just about faint cuz u figure $10 for a 16 oz. steak is too much and u make up the excuse, "Ah...the Lakers are on, can't do it...how about 1pm tomorrow?!!" I'm just kidding, but I know I'm not the only one who has mistakenly asked "What do u have a taste for?" And has gotten into a lengthy dialogue like ur speaking on a Senate floor talking about the benefit of reality talk shows, when u simply want to know if u want to hit up this 2 for $2.22 Whopper deal at BK or if u feel like splurging and splitting a $2, $4, $6 meal, minus the four and tha six, at Denny's where my dude works and he can hook us up on some extra fries! Simple questions but the complexity can be so lengthy...by the way. Tip 101: Always have a plan! (Wink, Wink!)
Not just when eating out either...I know back in my Shopaholic days...and believe u me, I still get small chills when I'm at the back of the store and I hear that pleasant sound of the register go "click, click, click, click..." for 3 minutes indicating a lengthy transaction being performed. I think I shop so much, that I can guess the total of the transaction just by the length of the sound of the receipt paper being spit out! 1 minute = about $100 dollars...2 minutes = around $150, but they had some returns...30 seconds = a cheap gift for a friend that costs like $5, all on a gift card...See, that ain't so hard! But I know I may some sales associates upset with me. I used to go to Woodfield Mall with my dudes (Coca and C Hagg...What up pimps! Yeah man, I got my own diary dawg!!...I mean...cough, cough..How are u doing my studious friends of many a years. Sorry, eye forgot where I was at for a minute!) But, we'll hit up that formerly the biggest mall in America back in tha day, and I was a walking consumer riot as I look back. I would be standing like in a Finish Line store, debating for like 20 minutes on some socks or something. If it came to kicks, I'll ask everybody what do they think. And I know the salesperson was thinking, "Just Do It." See...I only wear Nike sneakers back then, and I was taking so long, that's why he said...boy I need my own show on Comedy Central for real! Then I'll have the nerve to put the shoes on "hold" and never go back to get them. Don't laugh, cuz I KNOW somebody who's reading this has done the same. But once again simplicity turned in complexity.
As u think about life, it's just so funny about how many issues that are simple become so complex...While in class what magazine to do u choose 2 read as the teacher is talking about fotosinthesis...no, photosynthasis...no, whatever, something about flowers and the moon...tough decisions. Or if ur going to a "White Party" being thrown by somebody, u David Letterman glance at ur closet for 30 minutes, trying to figure out what color to wear?....How about u not washing clothes in a few days, and u realize u don't have any undies clean, what do u do go G.I. commando or do u just do ur best not to get sweaty for the evening. So when that hot song comes on at the club, and that guy pulls u to the dance floor u thinking "This better be my future baby daddy cuz he messing up my last pair of La Perla's and u know I gotta be at work in 2 hours!!"....What about when somebody at work just get done blowing their nose, and they were blowing so hard that u see their brain on the tissue, and then they hit u with that, "Ok, brotha, I'll see u tomorrow..." and extend their hand 2 u, do u give them a head nod, or do u shake their hand and hope that ur new diet of carrots and ginsing tea will carry u through this one!
All I can say, is that we want simple...we love simple...but a little bit of complexity adds a little spice to life. Even though I like syrup on my Eggo's with no butter...sometimes u need that hot sauce to keep u interested. Not too much, but just enough...every once in awhile.
If not, u'll be just be Froasted Flakes with no milk....Like Fruit Loops with no marshmallows..Or Apple Jacks without the "Snap, Crackle and Pop!".
Wait a minute...that makes no cents.
Exactly.
And that's why we never really want it. (Get it.)
Great.
Austino Galaxia I.
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