Rebounding...Remixed.

Mr. Wayman Tisdale

What a morning, already.  Been weird...watched an exceptionally great documentary on the late Wayman Tisdale.  Describing his days from being a star basketball player to being a very good smooth jazz performer on bass guitar.   Dealing with his right leg being amputated yet and still had that confidence that everything was going to be alright.  Still smiling and laughing, wanting to make a difference in people's lives.  That's what it is all about.  Encouraging words we heard in this film like:

- "If you wanna bloom, grow where the ground is fertile, but there are not a lot of plants there."
- "If you're a good player, your gonna get the press (media attention) no matter where you go."

Needed to see and hear his story, which I did not fully understand til today...wow, Brownstone just hit me just now...but Mr. Tisdale had an amazing life.  Keep going, no matter what...no matter what.

So Austin what do you feel right now?  Good question, been thinking about this "new season" so to speak in our life.  Been inspired by a lot of things we've had to go through, just recently.  But, u know what, I believe with all my heart it's gonna be ok.  Has anyone ever felt like once they've been through some things or some people it's like no matter what they try to do, they just can't go back to how things once were.  My boy once said, "and I won't look back no more."  My soul is starting to get a little happy cuz that was my song, and when I think about allllllllllll....alllllll...all  the trials and things which have made us stronger since 1998, when that cut was released, it's amazing.  Every once in awhile, u just think about all the people who have come and gone, not only by death but by making cameos in all of our's grand stage it's wild.  People doubting u to ur face, walking in the office and telling u ur services are no longer wanted.  Being in the locker room and 2 minutes before tip-off having the coach tell u your role has changed, and you are no longer starting...falling for, at that time, a dime piece, spending time with her, feeling her, leaving her, not hearing from her, wondering how could all that transpired even when she "claimed" she was of a different sexuality...huh...bygones are bygones, but I have such a crazy life, that I must tell the story.  I have

Will someone draw you one day?

I'm gonna say this until the God above says, "Amen" and Andy Warhol's my last breath from me:  "Life is about having fun."  Period, flat out and NO ONE can tell me no different, I refuse to hear it.  My thing is now, is finding people who share in a similar view of life.  Maybe, I just have too much of a laid back, "beachy chill" of a personality.  But only, if people would only know the fire that burns.  Its almost consuming.  I think I've also grown to realize that life is ever so short, that tomorrow isn't guaranteed.  Neither is the end of today.  So when being patient is being the overwhelming theme (Orestes Ramirez, mad shout out dude about telling ur story to me dawg!), it can sometimes cringe.  Now I don't live in such a no holds barred type of way, but I do feel like 'Pac, "We don't have time...".  Now this ain't no suicidal note writing, just how I feel.  So when...let me play my favorite song by Tupac.  I love music so, I was banging No Doubt not too long ago, them memories.  Speaking of favorites, Dave Koz is coming to South Florida for a jazz concert in West Palm Beach.  And guess who's coming with him...Candy Dulfer!!!  We've been saying if she ever brings her saxophone back to the states and nearby, I'm gone!!  So now here's an opportunity, so I think after I get done writing I'll have to get on ticketmaster, why not right!  Should be a fun concert, with Rick Braun and Jonathan Butler, talking about a big party next Sunday.  Should I go solo or take someone with?  We'll see on the whole sit-u-a-tion...

"What u won't...do for love, you tried everything, but you don't give up"...from the love standpoint, we are truly a unrestricted free agent, which is interesting...have to write this...If you've been reading our diary or if this is your first reading, we tell a lot of stories about life, money, and everything in between.  Some of which have involved our social life.  I said that I was gonna write a book one day, and I'm learning I have more than enough material to write...just on life as a single guy.  I'm in an interesting situation, because all of my "boys" have found their "angels", so to speak.  ALL.  It's a little different talking to them, in whom I love so much.  But to say it's not different would be to a disservice to every writer in the U.K. and abroad.  I've had many episodes which left me wondering like, what???  Or where did that come from?  I'm not the only one who's had crazy stuff, girls have told me of stalkers or episodes where I was like man...U got it bad.  But what I'm trying to do by telling these stories is show that you can survive, have a little, ok, ok, a lot of fun by relaying true stuff.  I believe in Love, no matter what has happened/ing in our lives, and one thing I'm learning is that sometimes God surprises and you may find your package just in a different wrapping.  Oh boy, I'ma stop cuz I think that I'm gonna write two diary posts today, so I'll save some for 2night.  But that's true.

Yeah...enough for now.  Time to enjoy the day, like we only know how.  What to do?  It seems sunny outside, should walk down to the beach and grab some sun.  Go for a Sunday drive out and about.  Clean up some.  Should be interesting.  Just let the day develop itself.  With us, u just never know what may take place...or where we'll end up.

Austino.