Blinky.

Well, I didn't think this post was gonna get written.  For a few reasons...One, I was gonna retire.  The feeling of writing like, absolutely just left my body.  I was having some kind of Quantum Leap experience, where I just felt like I had nothing else to say.  I've said it all, giving our best, and to be honest, I've felt like there's a lot of absolutely genius stuff on this diary, yet I didn't feel like I've blown up like I wished I should have.  Like if anybody were to look at some of these diaries...There are some classic posts, in ways I don't know if the Galaxy will ever see again.  So that got me to thinking...I don't know if it's even worth "The Push" when I feel like I should be some kind of star, and just sitting on tha side waiting for my turn at the Fame wheel.




Then Dos, I was thinking about developing another website.  When u write diaries, usually you fill up one notebook and then move on to the next one.  So I was in heavy talks with the Editors and Publishing House that be, to develop a new diary, with a new outlook and everything.  Actually, it's semi-created as I write this.  But...I'm being led to continue to write in this format.

Wow!  It's been a wild last few weeks in this diary.  I thought a lot about some sports teams and athletes and how they performed before they either won the championship or before they became one name stars...Or even when they performed before a small crowd.  I thought about D. Wade here with tha Heat, and that '09 season, and how hard he played, even when the house wasn't full.  And I know, cuz I sat in Section 407, Seats 1 and 2, night after night, and saw the effort he gave even when he was basically by himself to carry tha team.  Yet he performed.  I thought about Kobe during those years of 2004-2007, when such a burden was on just him.  My favorite baseball player Barry Bonds, and that infamous season of 1996, when my Giants lost so many games that year, I couldn't even get a Sportscenter highlight of their games, and when I did it was a quickie halfway during tha show.  Yet, my guy BB put on a show that year, even though he was sort of on an island where his excellence wasn't being noticed as it should have been.  How u get walked with tha bases loaded.  Huh.

Since this is a diary, let's just get real.  So, that's the feeling I've been having like, I'm not really getting a chance to play.  And when I do come up to tha plate in a clear cut situation where tha pitcher has to pitch to me (i.e. Bases Loaded and nobody out), I still get pitched around.  And I feel, personally, like, here I am, one of the best in tha game (Sounds Egotistical don't it), but still I don't get a chance to swing that bat.  It just don't make sense, and to be honest left me with a feeling like 'this just ain't fair'.  How come this guy sees pitches, but when I step to tha plate, I get treated differently.  That was weighing on my mind...heavily on my mind.

Something happened though.  I got a feeling of...acceptance, in terms of who I am as a person, as a dreamer, and as fulfiller of destiny.  It hit us, like you can look at things one of two ways.  Either from the half empty prospective in terms of why do have money, but still it doesn't seem to be enough...or maybe I should down play how I look...or I'm single, so something musts be wrong with me, if I keep getting these empty episodes in regards to love.  Or I could look at my life from a half full glance, like hey, u're blessed with something, or don't downplay ur looks, if other people can't handle it, so be it...plus, they don't know how much work u gotta put in to look "good"...Or u can use those lessons of love in a way, to suggest that u've been through so much, that ur super prepared for whomever steps into ur life.  I mean Super.  I was watching this J. Lo documentary on the Nuvo TV network, and one of Jen's former dance teachers gave a quote that basically summed up my new outlook...

"The Best is what I needed....And The Best of The Best is what I was looking for."

He had a purpose to who he wanted to make his dance ensemble. And he wasn't gonna settle.  So if it meant that 400 dancers didn't fit tha bill that day, and he had to set up another audition for another week, I feel like he was gonna do it.  It's so freakin' easy to just throw up ur hands and just stop, either ur search or just stop living when it feels like what u want and looking for, doesn't appear.  Especially, if u've been grinding for so long, and u feel like there must be something wrong with me, if things haven't come as easily for me as they have for others.  But...perhaps other people aren't looking for tha things that ur looking for.  Here's another quote, that my Pops told me yesterday, that has also giving me an extra push...

"...had a Pro body...but not a Pro game."

I flat out told Pops that I'm gonna steal that one.  Cuz that's really, Genius Talk.  Let me elaborate, living here in Miami, and especially here in tha 'hood of South Beach, u can get so caught up into tha apperance of beauty or wealth or coolness.  But then when u meet somebody or get to know them, ur like, this is all just fake.  Or they aren't a real friend.  The appear to have 'The Look', but deep down the don't have 'The Game' that it requires to be...who I want on my team.  Real talk.  Everybody thinks they have that material to be a star, but being a star requires a lot.  And a lot of it goes way beyond appearance and looking like u got money.  I still believe this, and know that it's true.  If you are Sexy or if u have real wealth (Money wise), you don't even have to say a word, it just glows.  A girl can walk into a room wearing a beat-up flannel shirt from the show Rosanne, but if she's sexy, she's gonna look hot, no matter what she puts on.  Same with if u got real loot, u don't have to brag to nobody, or pull out a wad, or even rock a fancy car, if u got chalupas, u got it, and don't have to prove it to anybody.

Which brings us to this here diary.  I'm not gonna force people to read it...I'm not gonna begging at tha corner of US-1 and Kendall Drive, passing out cards to read this or make me a star.  I'm gonna let tha material speak for itself.  For real....If somebody likes it, they'll tell somebody.  Period.  As u notice our diary has taken on a very simplistic view now.  "Austino Warhol" is tha look that I call it.  No gimmicks or anything.  Just..."Us."  One reason we have this attitude, because as I've said it before, this diary is being written in a sense of somebody going through the ropes to being a star.  So this diary may not be meant to be read right now in July 2013, we could be very well writing this in terms of somebody in tha year 2014, reading this, and looking back they find all that we had to go through to become who they see on TV and in magazines.  So even though I've been blessed to get over 20,000 views of this diary over the last two years...that's a lot for a diary....the time for us and this diary to be released beyond The Galaxy may not be for the present time.

On that note, I just have to continue to push, and give our best no matter what.  Live like it's our last day, (Although I'll never die anyway, but that's a different post for a different time.), and write like it's our last time, because we owe that one person, I owe YOU, our best.  I want this to be something all of us can cherish, because I used to think that I lived a life nobody else has.  Now I KNOW...So I'm gonna give our all, in terms of jokes, tears, dating and relationship lessons and whatever else pops into our life, so that somebody knows that even though things are one way one day...doesn't mean that it will always be or appear to be that way.  As my Pops also told me back in like 2003...

"Everything Can Change in a Blink of an Eye."

And if u thought I was off my rocker before, nobody has seen what's about to happen, and it all happen because of this simple action...

I finally blinked.


It's on...It's SOOO on.

Austino Galaxia Period.