Luv Child.

Well, I never thought this day would come,
But they claim that all good things must come to and end.
What shirt to wear, should I go with tha blue or tha white?
Really doesn't matter...after all this I'm gonna need a bottle of gin.

Guess I'll go with tha white one, yeah, that's tha one,
Even though, tha perfect color for today might as well be black.
Feel like I'm going to a funeral of sorts, one I never thought would come,
Almost u can say like a White Castle in Miami, selling a take home of a 50 pack.



White shirt, with a purple tie, my favorite color,
Throw on this John Varvatos suit coat, that I got for literally...one buck.
Sometimes it is good to be us, living tha life with all these hookups,
Like every week we're being tapped "Goose", while playing this game of 'Duck Duck.'

We just want to share in tha fun of this Galaxian lifestyle,
To be honest, that's it...If ur with us, then u gonna get a strong taste.
People are probably gonna look at me all crazy, at how we live and what we do,
But, So what...I'm tha aftermath of how a 4th grader acts after a lifestyle of constantly eating paste!

Anyways, where are my slacks, guess I pick out one that my Pops gave me,
These old Sansabelts look cool...Going 80s style, just like in tha days of Miami Vice.
Kind of symbolic of where my life is right now,
Living tha good life, yet feeling my life got cancelled by NBC...Maybe Hulu will take my risky slice

This outfit looks pretty good, at least by my standards,
Only thing missing is just some jewelry and some smell good-good.
Ain't even gonna lie, I'm mad as can be over this D&G cologne fragrance,
It ain't strong enough to turn a sexy gal's 'Maybe' into a "Sure Nuff Would."

Whatever, u just live and u learn...(Spritz!  Spritz! Spritz!)
Now what shoes do I put on for this evening where my whole life comes to a halt.
Should we go New York City hip rockin' tha sneaks with this dressy attire,
Or should I go formal...Tough decisions...Man, reading GQ as a youngster can sometimes become a fault.

Let's go with tha sneaks, over this funky looking socks,
Tell you what between my socks and my undies, I'm ready for an Italian American treat.
She might not date us South Beach hotties who have an ego like we got it all,
At least she might think about us entertaining her...I can do three backflips, right from my couch seat.

Check tha mirror...that's tight work right now,
Looks like I'm ready to make another announcement to tha world at hand.
This entire Monday, I've been having this on my mind, so I called up all tha news channels,
They said that they would meet me outside my apartment building, with a tha media caravans.

Talking about Satellites, Pop-Up tents, and Spotlights,
I even saw my guy from Downtown off of Flagler, setting up his hot dog stand on tha corner.
Earlier, I told him flat out, "Bro, u selling Hot Dogs, and Churros?? U trying to get it in, huh?"
He just told me, 'This is tha hot spot to be on today...U got TMZ and all tha networks from Turner.'

That was earlier today, so I have no idea what it looks like now,
For all I know, everybody has left but this little kid, who wants me to sign his heart.
Not literally, just this Valentine for this cutey in this six grade,
He says he's trying out for a 'Boyfriend' role, and with my help, he will be guaranteed tha part.

This small kid waits outside my apartment building every single day,
Always wanting me to give him a line about love...or something for his crush at his school.
We drop him a..."Love is an Action Word" or a..."Make her laugh by smashing a cooking over your head",
Every week he comes back and tells me he wants to go with me to my legendary parties...by tha pool.

He ain't ready for all that though, not at all,
Home dude needs to try not to get picked off of First Base, before he tries to hit a Home Run.
That was another one I told him, right before his Class Christmas Party last year,
'Before she's able to taste tha pickle, u first have to ask her if she'll let you lick her buns.'

Yeah...I got in trouble for that one, real big trouble, not good,
Never is, when u get a call from tha Principal over a kid in which u don't even know his name.
I was in tha middle of watching an E! True Hollywood Story Marathon, with organic popcorn in my lap,
When this woman accused me of brainwashing this little kiddo...She's such an overprotective dame.

My thought is this, and you can write this one down for free,
I mean Dennis Tha Menace came to tha Majors, so I'm gonna give him Major League Advice.
Matter of fact, pretty darn good advice if you ask me, I mean,
This time next year those 20 words could be auctioned off by Christie's for a $20 million dollar price.

Welcome to my life...One in which all I wanted was a big difference,
Tha difference that u see in those chaps who win tha competition of Survivor...the TV show.
Tell me that u don't get inspired watching people eat snakes, and drink sea weed juice,
It's amazing what u do for some money...Or when u fantasize that a girl's body reminds u of some Play-Doh.

Anyway, this kid is out there, as is all these media peeps,
I have no idea what to say, but to just speak from my heart...right?
That worked out for everybody else who's given it a try....
Guess it's showtime, and no more talk about us having all this fright.

I'm walking out, and I'm not even gonna lock tha door,
Cuz I'm probably gonna have to run back in here quicker than a GoDaddy.com Super Bowl Ad.
Here we go, I hope ur getting all of this on film, would u looka here,
What tha...Man...There's like a thousand folks out her with notebooks, pencils...and  IPads.

Ok.  It's now Do or Die...Now or Never,
Either with tha Lights on or tha Lights off...Have to choose.
Huge Breath....(Whew!)...Alright...
I'm gonna make sure this is gonna make tha top of every single news.

Alright, Alright...Thank You, Thank You...
(Over Here...Over Here...) Please, give me a few, and then we take pics.
Everybody just tone it down, just tone it down,
Boy, I get all this media out here...just imagine if I hadda made a Sex tape flick!

Fourscore and Seventeen years ago, there once was born a man,
Who came out with silver spoon in his mouth, and a Vogue magazine in his left hand.
And a basketball in his right...Psst!  Hey...Homegurl from tha Miami Hearld, u really wrote that?
I was just joking, but since u jotting...His birth brought from far tha grandest Mexico City Mariachi Band.

Enough, Enough of tha jokes, let's get down to business,
Cuz for real, today has be one of those days that I thought I'll never see.
Where every line I get into at a store, has somebody in front of me with card problems,
And where tha morning started with an "A plus" attitude, but by afternoon dropped to a hard "D".

I know much of u media are wondering why u are here on tonight,
Standing underneath this tree...Dude, whoever has that Aston should move it...the tree drips.
Don't want your James Bond to be looking like u ran past tha monkey cage at tha zoo,
Sorry, no where was I...This is tougher than I thought, I think I need something to sip.

Around 12 pm, Richmond, Virginia time, I came to a hard conclusion,
As I was watching a video of Janet Jackson singing my song, "I Get Lonely"...a song of love and fun.
Galaxia, and I did just use third person, was sitting down trying to get some dance moves,
Then it just hit me like some Looney Tunes Acme bricks..."Forget this...I'M DONE!!"

Like, today I am actually announcing my retirement from tha Love game,
Meaning that...(Sniff!  Sniff!)...Sorry, it's just that I get so emotional when it comes to Amor.
Lately, it just hasn't been worth it anymore, I'm literally so...tired,
Mentally, my brain is almost fried...my egg was on tha ceiling, now it has hit tha floor.

('But wait...Galaxia, what about...') Calm down, Calm down,
I'll give you an explanation to how I came to this decision, a tough one at that.
HEY...U UP IN THA TREE...I SAID, NO VIDEO TAPING USING CELL PHONES!!
Apologize that I have to be so strict...Escandalo TV once caught me and this D.R. Mommy...naked at that!

Getting back to this Press Conference thang, we are a wild and crazy guy,
I mean when u look up 'Fun', I'm listed like... as that 21st definition.
Should be number one, but u know how politics, money and education mix,
$20,000?  Man, I'll just pay $15 for tha 2am plug after tha Lavalife girls speak about their single condition.

Just lately, I've been feeling a little bit too unique,
Probably being too honest with u media folks, but like don't know if anybody can relate.
Everythang we do is at an ultra high level of living, dude,
We just wonder if I'm SkyWalker, and Love is being played by Darth Vader...who's agent is fate.

Galaxia is...I mean...we are one of tha most layed back people u'll ever meet,
Lately, it's been such a journey, that everyday it's like a different girl does something new.
Yesterday, I had a gurl, who I don't even remember meeting asking us about our job and stuff,
She was telling me stuff, and I asked how did u know?  Bro my mouth was opened almost like a Cuckoo.

Then I got to deal with cool girls who have boyfriends and this and that,
Tha girls are mad cool, it's just I don't want to have to deal with jealousies and cats watching my every move.
It's like I have everythang that I need right now for my dream lifestyle,
But sometimes it'll be nice to get that want as well...then everythang can move along really smooth.

I lay in bed thinking sometimes, why does my life have to be so complicated,
Like...Nobody else has to deal with all this stuff...It's like it's just so simple, ya dig.
That's why I invited all you media here tonight, on this South Beach evening...
Folks, I think I'm done...Hey Shorty...Yeah you, from BET...u got a tag hanging from your wig.

There really ain't nothing else to say, to be honest with you,
Thought about taking questions, but I got Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead on DVR pause.
Thanks for coming out, by tha way that's tha end of my diary as well,
Nuthing else to write about, straight up, I've spoken enough on tha behalf of Cupid's cause.

('But Galaxia, Are you gonna come back?...Galaxia! Galaxia!....  Slam!!!!)
Boy, I don't believe I did that, now what in tha world am I gonna do?
Dedicated so much time, sacrifice and prayers to this Luv and Fun thang,
Maybe I'll just take a trip to India...I always wanted a Bollywood beauty who loved JT's 20/20...Disc 2.

Alright, finally at my apartment's door, it should be open,
Now, all I got to do is flick on this light switc...Oh Man!  What are u doing in here?
"(Sniff!  Sniff!)  I just couldn't stand being outside as you announced ur retirement,
You...(Sniff!  Sniff!)....were tha only one who spoke real about love...using words without any fear."

Now looka here Little Dennis The Menace...wait, here's a Kleenex for ur nose,
Your messing up my dotted bed sheets...I just got these from zhe store...Wal's-A-Mart.
But...(Blooooow!!!)...Watch it little man, ur getting snot on my Hot Wheels car collection,
It's tough to find that Ferrari 458 and that blue Lambo...They teach u how to blow ur nose in Head Start?!

But, Little Man, I'm sorry to break u down like this,
It's just as time goes on...Love gets a little more complicated than can I dip my brush in ur paint.
"But, Galaxia, I saw you use that line on a girl a few weeks ago out by tha beach volleyball nets,
And the next day, I checked your Instagram and she's now ur friend...@JerseyGurlsRNeverSaints."

Well, yeah, but..."And then you say that u should take risks in love right?"
I did, but..."So u say that u should treat dames for more than their milk and apple pie right?"
Sure, but..."And u told me just early last week, that sometimes love is like a color-by-numbers,
How u can't be afraid to go outside tha lines, because true love sees mistakes as perfect imperfection in their sight."

I did..."Then why...(Sniff!  Sniff!)...Why then Galaxia are you giving up on Love?
I thought it was you who also told me, the last cookie is tha always to toughest one to eat...
You know what u added to tha end of that Galaxia?"  Yeah I do...
Because tha last bite, always makes you tha most full...that's why it is called such a treat.

(Sniff!  Sniff!)  "I need you Galaxia, I'm having some trouble up at school,
It's...It's...(Bloooowww!!) with this gurl.  And I told her all about you."
You did.  "Yeah.  I told her that I talk to you everyday, and u give me hope...
Yep...hope that I can have gurls like you that show up to ur door in overcoats, and high heels sky blue."

You didn't tell her that Little Man, did you? "Yes, I did...
Please, Please Galaxia, as I sit on your bed, please don't retire from this game."
I don't know Tattoo, I've done tha best I can, and it hasn't loved me back.
"(Sniff.)  I know, but u said one more year...not month...besides it just won't be tha same."

Ok, before I decide, what do you think I should do?
I mean, u seem to have all tha answers, if u were me, what would u do or say?
"For real!"...Yeah, for real..."Oh Boy, Outta sight!! Ok....(Sniff.),
Never thought I'll be giving u advice, I never thought two times a year I get Christmas Day!!

Let's see...Now, I've been reading some of your stuff Mr. Galaxia..."
(Smile.) Calling me Mr. Galaxia huh?!  U sound like u've done this before?
"I have, I mean you have taught me some stuff, so I have to teach tha younger kids,
U'll be surprised tha conversations that we have outside of Miss Corwin's Kindergarten door.

This is secret stuff, ok...Are you ready?"...As I'll ever be...
"Ok.  Now, You need to step ur game up some, lately I've been in tears.
People still haven't gotten tha best that you have to offer,
It's like you are about to win tha Multiplication class title, but...12X12 brings u fears."

Little Man, are u silly crazy right now?
Bro, I think u need to top sniffing tha Mozzarella Sticks during lunch!
My swagger is at an all-time high, like MJ in '92, Jordan or Jackson,
If my Swag was a bouquet of flowers, they'll be going for record numbers for just one bunch!

"Shhhh!  Tha teacher is speaking....
You need to enjoy yourself some, I mean take a girl out to play on tha swings.
Girls like swings...and they like see-saw's too...
Enjoy the little things in life more, instead of talking about all these Toys 'R Us thangs.

And another thing...I like how you are real, that's rare,
I told Little Tommy that tha other day, and he ended up with Miss 6th Grade."
So...what's tha big thang about that?..."What's tha big thang about that?...
This is a 2nd Grader who eats pencils, and wears big bifocals."...Huh. Only in Miami-Dade?!!

"Two more thangs...you need to go to tha library....Yep, that's what u need 2 do.
That's where all tha hot babes hang in my school...got their heads in tha books.
You should seen Sonya, she's from the Australia, and she's so cool,
Next week, she's gonna show me how to fling a boomerang, and later her Mom is gonna Safari cook."

You are just a small little Playboy aren't you?
Hopefully you are learning a little more in school than how to attract the honey.
"Hey, I'm not tha one who thought about giving up earlier today, that was you...
I have a lot of girls around me at school, matter of fact they are so cool, they're giving me their lunch money."

Whoa....Whoa...I didn't tell you nothing about that.
A woman should be treated like a Queen at all times...always ease her burden.
"That's true, but like our lunch meals just got raised like to $4.00 a pop,
And my folks can't afford it...They are so mad they are thinking about calling up Chef Gordon!"

Ur too much..."But I just want to say, this and I'll let you go...
From school, I learn that sometimes tha best is saved for last."
How do you know that, Little Pumpkin Boy?
"Because my last names starts with a 'Z'...and right now, I'm at tha top of my class!

Galaxia, I love to hear your stories, and everythang has happened for a reason,
So don't trip, when u knock over chocolate milk spills during nap time.
Luv is your craft, and you have been able to perfect it over time...
My teacher says, 'I'll take the apples with worms, because they can still be worth a dime.'"

What in tha..."Trust me, it took me five weeks to know what that meant too.
But think about that some, and you'll see that the best is right under your nose.
Speaking of which, I have to go, my Mom is going to think I ran away tonight,
Hey, thanks for tha Kleenex...(Splat!)...Nice place, u just need some of those speakers made by Bose."

Alright, Little Man, you're tha only one who can bring me out of retirement,
I guess, for now at least, I'm back in tha game, just with a different outlook on this love thang.
"Hey, Ur tha best, and ur advice has always worked for me at school,
Even with Miss Watson, our pretty Cleaning Lady...she likes me, but...ahh...I got no time for no flings."

Take care little man, and once again, Thanks,
Even Galaxia needs to hear some words from another reliable source.
"No problem, Sir!  I'll be back tomorrow waiting to see what happens, Ok!
And remember Austino..."  What?!..."RIDE LIFE LIKE U WOULD RIDE A HORSE!"

Get outta here kid....O Boy!  That kid there is something else,
Can't believe tha night that I had once again.
Press conferences, having a snotty little boy all over my bed,
Perhaps he was just here to help a some-what, so-called friend.

I just want to have fun, and leave a legacy that I was one of tha best,
Someone different who lived at a high level, and wanted all to enjoy tha ride to tha top.
Not snobby, but just unique in a Galaxian type of way,
On a journey that, even on today almost came to a complete stop.

Yet, we continue on this journey of Fun and of Love,
Realizing tha best is about to come, and we can't worry about what tha journey did.
Yeah, I got my Swagga back, and now I'm gonna do this thang like never before...
And share with others this ride to stardom...and one day think back on what woulda happened...

If I never ran into that little kid.


Luv.
Austino...From My Heart.
Toodles and Hugs!!