(Parental Discretion Advised)
I don't know how to begin today's post since we have a little time to write. Our diary is sumthin' else ain't it. Even after tha last post I feel like I'm revealing too much...But heck we've been doing it for like 2 years now on cyberspace. And as of last week, our contract got renewed, so u can see our diary for years too come. To be honest, I think the things we write about aren't geared to tha present, but perhaps for tha future. Like somebody who wants to know tha ends and outs on what it really takes and what u really go through as u strive to become Somebody, will one day view this as tha viewprint. On how to keep going, on how emotional the journey can be, on how to handle different things when it comes to relationships and love. Hopefully, our life can just help that someone. I put myself out here, for reasons I still don't know why, cuz I feel like not too many are exposing themselves in tha fashion that we do. I'm sure there are some, but just the wacky and sometimes embarrassing stories that we share with you, and nobody else, can be a little too intimate, but hey, one day, we all will look back and laugh, and think back to these days when it was just beginning...
So on that note how do we write on today? I have a lot brewing inside of us right now, so we're trying to get tha right thoughts to what to say...Let me take a quick break to see how we're gonna be lead on today...
I think this is gonna be interesting...
Ok. The other day somebody asked me a question about my love life. Now contrary to the seemingly endless stories that are throughout this diary, I'm still kind of private when it comes to tha knowledge of who I'm "interacting" with. I guess I'm tha kind of brotha who has his boys tell him, "Dude, u just see that girl who walked in?! She's super hot!" When in tha back of my mind I'm thinking, "You should of seen what she was wearing last night when we were out til 2 in tha morning!" And I guess I like, no I LOOOVE girls who like to handle their business with their man, and not have their business all in tha street, u know. Hold on, I gotta play this Robin Thicke song for some inspiration. Sing it boy! So many times people ask others or brag to others about their supposedly conquests, and either who they are talking to begins to hate on them. Or the person who being confide in like an Amor Psychologist begins to have their curiosity peeked upon, and begins to move in on that person's crush or beau. Not too many times is somebody just gonna be Joe Cool about somebody else's brag-ga-to-cious behavior, unless they either have somebody or are comfortable in their own skin. Anyways...
The question that was asked of me was, "What is tha maximum number of girls that I've kissed?" Big H, that's a good question...
Well, since this is our diary, might as well share about how we operate right. Moms and Pops, I think there is something burning on the stove, so u might want to check on that for a little bit! (Wink!) The first response I had was that I very rarely, or basically never tell the number of dolls I've tongue kissed or eskimo kiss. Nor do I state how many girls I've bagged...done...hit...screwed...laid pipe on...made love...did tha nasty with...banged...slept with...played naked Twister with...or played Doctor and Nurse with...or even planted tha flag on. I recall hearing something in my pre-youth days. I'm actually in my youth days now...But I recall a man say something that has been a prep for my life today...
A true gentleman never speaks upon his love conquests.
I believed that to our core. And it hit home, almost like somebody was talking to me about our future. Because I have been asked numerous questions about us, or about this or that girl. And even though I share stories, I keep numbers to ourself. Which leads to back part of our response....
"I don't measure love in quantity but in quality."
Being a guy like myself, with a ego of myself, and having been around what we've been around, it can be easy to get caught up in the numbers game. Man, I think I'm gonna be too real tonight, but u know what, this is where we're being led so let's continue...Many of us, think that having more than one doll, that includes Barbie and her friend, on ur team, makes u more of a man. But in some ways it doesn't...Why? Becomes sometimes it can be...complicated.
Which girl do u ask to tha game? For Christmas, who gets tha Marc Jacobs bag, and who gets tha one from 5-7-9? What happens if I see this one girl while I'm out with this other girl? I always say, when dating somebody or what have you, to be straight up with tha person, and not trying to 'play' them. Meaning, if you're dating or courting like our parents and grandparents did back in tha day...Then freakin' tell them. Instead of lying or hiding behind tha truth, ya dig. If u be straight up, then u won't have to worry about those above situations, cuz they know going into this thang. And if they are willing to be part of tha team, and not be tha whole team, then that's cool...But a lot of times, and especially with us guys, we don't wanna give up that P Control as Prince once said. Cuz we know that if we allow tha girl to make the decision to be with us when we're dating others, that gives her also the right to date other men. And that can be too competitive, knowing that tha girl u dig, may be getting dug by somebody else. I play this song a lot, but I love TLC. Where was I?
Oh yes...so I'm learning to not get caught up with tha numbers game. For one...Somebody needs to hear this, so forgive me for speaking like I'm about to speak on, but I've been through a lot. I've been blessed to have family members say a lot about life and love, so I MUST keep it real. Forgive tha language if it's too much, but we need to get this dating and relationship thing under control...Especially down here in Miami.
Going back to the numbers thang...More doesn't necessarily mean better. There's a secret phrase among the guys which says that...All Pussy ain't Good Pussy. That can mean a lot besides just sex or what not. One, that means that just because u get with somebody doesn't mean it was...worth it. Two, that indicates that we shouldn't look at women just as a number in our notch. And three, just because a person brags that they are all that, doesn't mean that they are all that. It's almost like me getting drafted by the Dallas Cowboys football team. After being with them, somebody asks me if they are the best team I've ever played for. And since I was drafted by them, and its the only team I know then I say yes. But if I've "been around the block" a few times, I might have a different opinion. Which opens up a whole nother thing about dating...
Should I? Whatever I am....
We should get back to dating and learning about people instead of this "love at first sight" mentality. I raise my hand higher than an airplane flying over South Beach advertising what happening at Mansion this upcoming Friday night! I'm big time guilty of meeting a cool girl or seeing somebody, and thinking if this dame has...a speck of dirt on tha bottom of her feet or if she has four abs showing instead of six or if she one of her fingernails has chipped polish or if she's wearing a Dodgers t-shirt instead of my SF Giants or if she has a "tramp stamp" on her back or if she has a BIG dog or Khaki pants that were popular back in 1999 or if she cusses after every word or if she says she hates R and B music or if I see her eating a burger while rocking a swimsuit...thinking after seeing this first sight, that this girl ain't tha one for me. Not considering that...
Tha girl might have just come from tha beach...or she hasn't worked out in a few day cuz she was sick or she scraped her finger while at her desk at work...or her Dad was a Big Dodgers fan and today is tha anniversary of his passing...or she got that "tramp stamp" just because it was tha trend in '04, but she's getting it removed tomorrow...or she'e always had a big dog because it reminds her of back home in Massachusetts...or she's wearing those Khaki pants because those are her lucky pair...or she cusses cuz every guy she's dated liked that "one of tha guys" attitude, but will gladly change if she would to meet tha right guy...or she said she hates R and B music, because a R&B artist just broke up with her moments before u saw her...or she's eating a burger on tha sand because she forgot her cooler at home, and she's really hungry.
There are a lot of reasons why seeing ain't always believing. And I have, made several misjudgments in our past to why a girl AIN'T Galaxia material. When if I would have given her a chance, I might have made at least a cool friend. But, being in my South Beach mode of she has to be curvy, 36D-28-42, with a 29 waist being too big, type of mindset, I may have missed out.
I'm saying all this, cuz I don't want folks to duplicate tha same mindset I may have had years ago. I do mean years, but sometimes it creeps up even without knowing. Do you sense what I'm feeling...Yep. I sense a story. You didn't think I ran out of them did you?! I may even have two...So...If you've been following our diary since day one, you know what two words are about to follow...
I remember...
I'll try my best to protect tha innocent. So about a few months ago I was involved with a class that had to do with my job. It was cool and all. I learned a lot, had a chance to meet different people, who had some similar goals and work ethic when it camed to career goals and stuff. I appreciate when people dress up, because it's just refreshing u know. Nowadays everybody is so dumbed down that jeans is considered like the ultimate upscale fashion. So there are guys and girls in this joker, several girls who were cool, and looked attractive, but it was this one girl who I don't know why, but she caught our attention.
She was kind of my height. She really looked amazing, but...she wasn't my typical type. (As if I have one. Whatever...) But she was a very sexy plus-size gal, with a cute face, of Hispanic decent, she dressed in these two-piece dress suits, and she had a small tattoo on her wrist I believe, she had a small but noticeable nose ring and she had a thing for having long fingernails. All dolled up in different colors. Now I've seen and have even had a piece of her so to speak here or there in a girl, but never have I had like all those characteristics in one girl. She was...different. And always remember...
Different is Sexy.
I was fortunate to talk to her some. She was mad cool. Even talked about not having "no life" since she worked so much. (Interesting...) Then how proper she would speak in class, and looking at her style and how she rocked those stilettos, I'm like this girl is right for real...Yet...Even though this is a girl I want to get to know, this might not be tha type of girl that perhaps family or my boys expect me to bring home to a reunion. Basically I was still tip toeing and Mickey Mousing around knowing that I really didn't have anything to loose, but I usually interact with girls who has a presence but not this type of presence with her. So throughout all this instead of approaching her, being like "What's up", I was conjuring up all these stupid reasons NOT date or at least get to know her. I work out all the type, but she looks like she's not into that...She has the humbleness that she likes the simple life, when I'm used to dealing with chickenheads...I mean girls who get salty if their Chanel bag is not in stock when their hookup at the store told them it would be on tha truck that day...Whenever I sneak a peek at her in class, she doesn't look back, so that must mean she doesn't want me. All these crazy things dude...I needed a sign...
So the last day of class, I made up our mind that I was gonna "get it in" on today...if and only if the opportunity presents itself. Nothing forced. So I saw my girl, and of course she looked mad amazing wearing a low top blouse showing off her boobs, dressed professionally, as she always did. The class began, and deep inside I was wondering if fate was gonna be on my side. The class began...Nothing...We had a break...She left like before we did, and went to eat with somebody else...Nothing...Break ended and she came back...Class continued...Nothing. Class ended...Chalk it up to tha game, cuz it just ain't in tha cards.
After tha class, I just took the Zen Master approach of "What would be, would be", and realized that this girl wasn't meant for us. And I'm not forcing anything anymore when it comes to love. So the class ended, and I had to get my parking validated. I went to the usual spot for validation, but evidently they moved it. I then walked like 50 feet to where the validation stamp machine was. I ran into this girl I knew, sounds familiar down here in Miami, but I really did. And we talked. I got my parking stamped, and turned around my left shoulder, and low and behold, look who's walking directly towards me. The girl that I wanted to find out about "her brain."
What do we say? Now I got a familiar audience surrounding this whole scene, and they've never seen us like straight up get our "What's Your Sign?" pre-rehearsed script on. The girl is coming, and coming...she walks to us, tells us, "Bye, See you later." with an unbelievable sign and goes on by after we replied with a "Have a good one." of our own. I took a few steps and just stopped. I looked back briefly, and saw that this angel was talking to my homegirl who've I just spoken with. And a thought crossed us to do a complete Nike 180 and just let it ALL out. Not in a desperate mode, never that, but just in a, "Look, I've noticed you...blah blah blah...I just had to tell you, if nobody else does...blah, blah, blah...Do you prefer riding with the top on or off...blah, blah, blah". But in the most rarest of actions, and I DO MEAN rarest, I didn't. Which as soon as I walked out the building, I just thought, "Fudge!" (Edited) Number one, I don't fear opprotunities. Two, I don't usually goof up ones sent from The Great Matchmaker in Tha Sky. And Three, I let uncertainty dicate me not taking a chance on somebody, whom I don't usually date, but somebody I really thought was fine, just because of my so called status quo.
It was one of the worst feelings I had...Ever. And it lasted for days...Cuz I knew it was an opp.
Things happen for a reason, because I later found out that she moved up to like Palm Beach. I should check her out this weekend. Would that be stalkerish?!! Just kidding. But sometimes you have to act on your heart and not your eyes. SWV sing another one of my all-time classics! And what I'm learning is that sometimes "Love @ 1st Sight" doesn't become 1st sight, until you look back on tha moment u first saw or met somebody. Hindsight is 20/20. Even though I do think that u can have a funny feeling when u meet that "one", I also know that looking back on that moment, and realizing all the things that lined up in ur favor, can also mean "Love at 1st Sight."
This was long I know, but...Dating in Miami, and definitely South Beach is interesting. Sometimes a "Hot" plus another "Hot" can equal a "Cold". That was egotistical math, but true. Looks dominate the scene down here, and so many barriers whether artificial or made up prevent you from meeting the true person or for somebody to let their guard down for 3 minutes. You meet or go out with somebody, and they already have that MTV ring programmed. You know what I'm talking about. If you don't like who u're dating or just in case, u can have u phone programmed to ring, so you can hit ur date with that "I forgot I gotta go and get some milk" line! But for real, if somebody wears tha wrong color of Gap Blue, or if a gal decides to go geeky with tha glasses and drinking water, we decide this person ain't wifey or hubby material, so why waste any time. Not knowing that if u truly interact with that person, they not only might be a cool friend, but may even know a friend who knows a friend that might be right for you. You never know...never know.
That's it. Keep ur options open in all walks of life, and take some risks. You never know what's behind tha mask, and you might be tha one who can bring out tha best in someone.
I talk not from what I've heard...but what I know.
Two fingers on ur lips!
Austino.
I believed that to our core. And it hit home, almost like somebody was talking to me about our future. Because I have been asked numerous questions about us, or about this or that girl. And even though I share stories, I keep numbers to ourself. Which leads to back part of our response....
"I don't measure love in quantity but in quality."
Being a guy like myself, with a ego of myself, and having been around what we've been around, it can be easy to get caught up in the numbers game. Man, I think I'm gonna be too real tonight, but u know what, this is where we're being led so let's continue...Many of us, think that having more than one doll, that includes Barbie and her friend, on ur team, makes u more of a man. But in some ways it doesn't...Why? Becomes sometimes it can be...complicated.
Which girl do u ask to tha game? For Christmas, who gets tha Marc Jacobs bag, and who gets tha one from 5-7-9? What happens if I see this one girl while I'm out with this other girl? I always say, when dating somebody or what have you, to be straight up with tha person, and not trying to 'play' them. Meaning, if you're dating or courting like our parents and grandparents did back in tha day...Then freakin' tell them. Instead of lying or hiding behind tha truth, ya dig. If u be straight up, then u won't have to worry about those above situations, cuz they know going into this thang. And if they are willing to be part of tha team, and not be tha whole team, then that's cool...But a lot of times, and especially with us guys, we don't wanna give up that P Control as Prince once said. Cuz we know that if we allow tha girl to make the decision to be with us when we're dating others, that gives her also the right to date other men. And that can be too competitive, knowing that tha girl u dig, may be getting dug by somebody else. I play this song a lot, but I love TLC. Where was I?
Oh yes...so I'm learning to not get caught up with tha numbers game. For one...Somebody needs to hear this, so forgive me for speaking like I'm about to speak on, but I've been through a lot. I've been blessed to have family members say a lot about life and love, so I MUST keep it real. Forgive tha language if it's too much, but we need to get this dating and relationship thing under control...Especially down here in Miami.
Going back to the numbers thang...More doesn't necessarily mean better. There's a secret phrase among the guys which says that...All Pussy ain't Good Pussy. That can mean a lot besides just sex or what not. One, that means that just because u get with somebody doesn't mean it was...worth it. Two, that indicates that we shouldn't look at women just as a number in our notch. And three, just because a person brags that they are all that, doesn't mean that they are all that. It's almost like me getting drafted by the Dallas Cowboys football team. After being with them, somebody asks me if they are the best team I've ever played for. And since I was drafted by them, and its the only team I know then I say yes. But if I've "been around the block" a few times, I might have a different opinion. Which opens up a whole nother thing about dating...
Should I? Whatever I am....
We should get back to dating and learning about people instead of this "love at first sight" mentality. I raise my hand higher than an airplane flying over South Beach advertising what happening at Mansion this upcoming Friday night! I'm big time guilty of meeting a cool girl or seeing somebody, and thinking if this dame has...a speck of dirt on tha bottom of her feet or if she has four abs showing instead of six or if she one of her fingernails has chipped polish or if she's wearing a Dodgers t-shirt instead of my SF Giants or if she has a "tramp stamp" on her back or if she has a BIG dog or Khaki pants that were popular back in 1999 or if she cusses after every word or if she says she hates R and B music or if I see her eating a burger while rocking a swimsuit...thinking after seeing this first sight, that this girl ain't tha one for me. Not considering that...
Tha girl might have just come from tha beach...or she hasn't worked out in a few day cuz she was sick or she scraped her finger while at her desk at work...or her Dad was a Big Dodgers fan and today is tha anniversary of his passing...or she got that "tramp stamp" just because it was tha trend in '04, but she's getting it removed tomorrow...or she'e always had a big dog because it reminds her of back home in Massachusetts...or she's wearing those Khaki pants because those are her lucky pair...or she cusses cuz every guy she's dated liked that "one of tha guys" attitude, but will gladly change if she would to meet tha right guy...or she said she hates R and B music, because a R&B artist just broke up with her moments before u saw her...or she's eating a burger on tha sand because she forgot her cooler at home, and she's really hungry.
There are a lot of reasons why seeing ain't always believing. And I have, made several misjudgments in our past to why a girl AIN'T Galaxia material. When if I would have given her a chance, I might have made at least a cool friend. But, being in my South Beach mode of she has to be curvy, 36D-28-42, with a 29 waist being too big, type of mindset, I may have missed out.
I'm saying all this, cuz I don't want folks to duplicate tha same mindset I may have had years ago. I do mean years, but sometimes it creeps up even without knowing. Do you sense what I'm feeling...Yep. I sense a story. You didn't think I ran out of them did you?! I may even have two...So...If you've been following our diary since day one, you know what two words are about to follow...
I remember...
I'll try my best to protect tha innocent. So about a few months ago I was involved with a class that had to do with my job. It was cool and all. I learned a lot, had a chance to meet different people, who had some similar goals and work ethic when it camed to career goals and stuff. I appreciate when people dress up, because it's just refreshing u know. Nowadays everybody is so dumbed down that jeans is considered like the ultimate upscale fashion. So there are guys and girls in this joker, several girls who were cool, and looked attractive, but it was this one girl who I don't know why, but she caught our attention.
She was kind of my height. She really looked amazing, but...she wasn't my typical type. (As if I have one. Whatever...) But she was a very sexy plus-size gal, with a cute face, of Hispanic decent, she dressed in these two-piece dress suits, and she had a small tattoo on her wrist I believe, she had a small but noticeable nose ring and she had a thing for having long fingernails. All dolled up in different colors. Now I've seen and have even had a piece of her so to speak here or there in a girl, but never have I had like all those characteristics in one girl. She was...different. And always remember...
Different is Sexy.
I was fortunate to talk to her some. She was mad cool. Even talked about not having "no life" since she worked so much. (Interesting...) Then how proper she would speak in class, and looking at her style and how she rocked those stilettos, I'm like this girl is right for real...Yet...Even though this is a girl I want to get to know, this might not be tha type of girl that perhaps family or my boys expect me to bring home to a reunion. Basically I was still tip toeing and Mickey Mousing around knowing that I really didn't have anything to loose, but I usually interact with girls who has a presence but not this type of presence with her. So throughout all this instead of approaching her, being like "What's up", I was conjuring up all these stupid reasons NOT date or at least get to know her. I work out all the type, but she looks like she's not into that...She has the humbleness that she likes the simple life, when I'm used to dealing with chickenheads...I mean girls who get salty if their Chanel bag is not in stock when their hookup at the store told them it would be on tha truck that day...Whenever I sneak a peek at her in class, she doesn't look back, so that must mean she doesn't want me. All these crazy things dude...I needed a sign...
So the last day of class, I made up our mind that I was gonna "get it in" on today...if and only if the opportunity presents itself. Nothing forced. So I saw my girl, and of course she looked mad amazing wearing a low top blouse showing off her boobs, dressed professionally, as she always did. The class began, and deep inside I was wondering if fate was gonna be on my side. The class began...Nothing...We had a break...She left like before we did, and went to eat with somebody else...Nothing...Break ended and she came back...Class continued...Nothing. Class ended...Chalk it up to tha game, cuz it just ain't in tha cards.
After tha class, I just took the Zen Master approach of "What would be, would be", and realized that this girl wasn't meant for us. And I'm not forcing anything anymore when it comes to love. So the class ended, and I had to get my parking validated. I went to the usual spot for validation, but evidently they moved it. I then walked like 50 feet to where the validation stamp machine was. I ran into this girl I knew, sounds familiar down here in Miami, but I really did. And we talked. I got my parking stamped, and turned around my left shoulder, and low and behold, look who's walking directly towards me. The girl that I wanted to find out about "her brain."
What do we say? Now I got a familiar audience surrounding this whole scene, and they've never seen us like straight up get our "What's Your Sign?" pre-rehearsed script on. The girl is coming, and coming...she walks to us, tells us, "Bye, See you later." with an unbelievable sign and goes on by after we replied with a "Have a good one." of our own. I took a few steps and just stopped. I looked back briefly, and saw that this angel was talking to my homegirl who've I just spoken with. And a thought crossed us to do a complete Nike 180 and just let it ALL out. Not in a desperate mode, never that, but just in a, "Look, I've noticed you...blah blah blah...I just had to tell you, if nobody else does...blah, blah, blah...Do you prefer riding with the top on or off...blah, blah, blah". But in the most rarest of actions, and I DO MEAN rarest, I didn't. Which as soon as I walked out the building, I just thought, "Fudge!" (Edited) Number one, I don't fear opprotunities. Two, I don't usually goof up ones sent from The Great Matchmaker in Tha Sky. And Three, I let uncertainty dicate me not taking a chance on somebody, whom I don't usually date, but somebody I really thought was fine, just because of my so called status quo.
It was one of the worst feelings I had...Ever. And it lasted for days...Cuz I knew it was an opp.
Things happen for a reason, because I later found out that she moved up to like Palm Beach. I should check her out this weekend. Would that be stalkerish?!! Just kidding. But sometimes you have to act on your heart and not your eyes. SWV sing another one of my all-time classics! And what I'm learning is that sometimes "Love @ 1st Sight" doesn't become 1st sight, until you look back on tha moment u first saw or met somebody. Hindsight is 20/20. Even though I do think that u can have a funny feeling when u meet that "one", I also know that looking back on that moment, and realizing all the things that lined up in ur favor, can also mean "Love at 1st Sight."
This was long I know, but...Dating in Miami, and definitely South Beach is interesting. Sometimes a "Hot" plus another "Hot" can equal a "Cold". That was egotistical math, but true. Looks dominate the scene down here, and so many barriers whether artificial or made up prevent you from meeting the true person or for somebody to let their guard down for 3 minutes. You meet or go out with somebody, and they already have that MTV ring programmed. You know what I'm talking about. If you don't like who u're dating or just in case, u can have u phone programmed to ring, so you can hit ur date with that "I forgot I gotta go and get some milk" line! But for real, if somebody wears tha wrong color of Gap Blue, or if a gal decides to go geeky with tha glasses and drinking water, we decide this person ain't wifey or hubby material, so why waste any time. Not knowing that if u truly interact with that person, they not only might be a cool friend, but may even know a friend who knows a friend that might be right for you. You never know...never know.
That's it. Keep ur options open in all walks of life, and take some risks. You never know what's behind tha mask, and you might be tha one who can bring out tha best in someone.
I talk not from what I've heard...but what I know.
Two fingers on ur lips!
Austino.
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