Invitation Only.

Well, thanks Liz and Starla,
That was quite an introduction that you gave.
Making me blush with all tha adjectives and adverbs,
Didn't know there was a Sexiest News lady Award...that trophy I will save.

I know you Mommys back in tha studio are jealous,
Wishing that you were in my Jimmy Choo's at this moment.
Getting paid to party, and bring tha entire Galaxy tha scoop live,
Who says that being a flawlessly beautiful doesn't pay off...this is why I don't eat donuts.



Me, Yours Truly, is here in this Pop Up Club on 2night,
For one of the biggest announcements in recent memory.
The only ones which compare is MJ saying, "This Is It",
Or that First Season of The Bachelor, when it was down to those 3.

Austino Galaxy is gonna be in tha house on tonight,
As you can tell by tha music bouncing off of every single door.
So many hot and wealthy guys are in the house tonight,
Pharrell, Justin Tee...Heck, I've forgotten to even keep score.

Huh?...Liz, I can barely hear you Mami,
I think I got u...You asked if William Levy was here.
He actually is, and he just walked in with Adam Levine,
Trust me when I say those are two bull tooshes that I'll luv to steer.

You name them, they are in tha house for this special day,
Kayne, Kobe, and OMG!...Starla, in just walked in David Becks.
I know how much u luv him, and I shouldn't be saying this on tha air live,
But didn't you two have a rendezvous once on DiCaprio's Yacht Deck.

Say that again, Liz....Ok, I can hear you better now,
You said that Maria wondered if there were any hot girls as well.
Gurl, I luv how you are so urself, and ain't afraid to be you,
Yet, that question is sorta Bi-Sexual...What are u hiding from ur Papi Mel?

As I look around, I guess you can say I've never seen more ladies,
Everybody is represented, and they all look like stars.
Some figuratively, while some are literally,
Right now it's like Beauty Heaven over there by tha Bacardi sponsored Open Bar.

All these hotties from tha Spanish Novelas are over there,
Sofia Vee is now grinding all up on Kelly Kapowski...now she switched.
The Whitley girl from A Different World is dancing tha night away,
While I overheard Pamela and Madonna chatting away on tha joys of being a 90's B---h.

Then u got so many slept on beauties like Charlotte York,
Jennifer from Rules of Engagement...and Dania Ramirez from tha show Devious Maids.
Don't look now, but Galaixa's homegurl Agnes from Despicable Me fame just walked in,
Along with her sisters...Either the Bouncer at tha door ain't checking ID's or got freakin' paid.

Bonitas up in tha Studio, this is tha place to be for sure,
Even the food is laid out like the ultimate party spread.
Only a party thrown by Galaxia could have these items:
Organic Sun Chips, Sugar-Free M&M's...And look Liz...Chocolate Chip Wheat Bread.

Whadda Ya Say, Liz??? Huh...Oh, Mamma Mio,
How come this Ear piece keeps on going out?
This station needs to stop getting tha goods from Going Out of Business sales,
I'm gonna call this Leo guy to fix this...Last time, his help cost me a few Bedroom Shouts.

Como?...Wha...We're still on live...Smack!
What you just heard was a little joke between me and tha ladies in tha studio.
See Leo is just a guy I met at a party thrown by Pitbull and Daddy Yankee,
Those are my guys, it's amazing how I fall for a Spanish accent spitting tha words, "Mama Yo."

Enough about tha atmosphere, pumping through this joint,
I shoulda known that Little Havana would attract ultra hotness walking through tha door.
One thang that was a surprise ladies was tha appearance of Britney Spears,
She made a special trip from Vegas to sing one of Galaxia's fav songs..."Gimme More."

Speaking of Galaxia, this is what this whole event is about,
He's...(Bump!)...I know this Chonga Chick didn't just bump me like she's owed something by tha world.
I know we on tha air, but she don't know me hun, I'm a cra Puerto Rican Mommy,
I will put a Chiquita Banana in her gas tank...I don't care if u played Gretchen from tha movie Mean Girls.

Calm down...Calm Down...Don't lose it...
Just remember chapter 1, page 143 from that Tony Robbins book.
The Visualization of Anger can beget a great first date kiss,
Something like that...Ryan Reynolds walked in tha bookstore as I skimming...So I couldn't really look.

As I was saying though, tonight is all about Galaxia,
By looking at these strobe lights, I feel like I'm in tha middle of Outer Space.
I have no idea who did tha decorations but they look so Galaxy like,
Rumor has it that Elroy Jetson did it...and we all know his Mom had such Futuristic taste.

Speaking of rumors, they are at an all-time hype 2night,
Wondering what is Galaxia gonna announce in front of this alluring crowd.
Could he be retiring from writing?  Or is he gonna admit to his crush on this Cuban doll?
Tha one who he thinks has tha ultra personality and let's her flawless face go Bear Naked style.

Gurls, I am pumped for this, and wait, tha man has arrived,
Looking very natural, as he grabs a mic...Never heard so many screams.
Tha last time was when my Uncle in San Juan left for New Year's 2012,
I threw a mad wild party, lots of licking...and me ain't just talking from tha Absolut Vanilla Ice Cream.

That's a cool outfit he has on, no wonder he's gonna be a star,
Other people usually have stylists or even still are dressed by their Mama.
Toronto Maple Leafs Ski Hat, Green Seven Jeans,
With J's as The Son of Mars, and a cute tee with tha pic of the Head Surmf...Big Papa.

The music is now being toned down a little bit,
Everybody is now getting their phones out, even tha dancing girls in tha cage.
Now it looks like a glow is being pointed up front, right on Galaxia,
This is tha moment...Tha next voice u hear is from Tha Man himself, live from tha stage.

(Boooop!)  "Freakin' Mic...I have a little trouble raising tha stand,
Who just got done singing?...Hey, Miss Aguilera next time raise it after u sing "Loving Me 4 Me."
Allllright...I'm am so hyped right now!  Tell me beautiful people...
Can we throw a party or can we throw a Freakin' Party?!!!

(Crowd Noise) Good that's what I love 2 hear,
Everybody coming together looking sexy and having a clean good time.
Lots of friends and family are in tha Hizzle on tonight,
Ladies u all look so fantasized...Mariah, how u get in?  Hey?!!...Who let in tha "Nine"?!!

Nuthin' but 10's...Just joking Miss Mariah,
Can't wait until u take tha stage after I talk a little about this thang.
Most of you already know who I am, but if u don't...
You won't be getting tha departing gift bag..Full of million dollar bras and Hublot watch bling.

Well, let's get straight to it on tonight,
Been quite awhile since I've even written in this diary of ours.
Tha last few weeks has been an complete blur,
Trips home, Miami Party Nights, living like a jailbird being released from tha bars.

But I feel like it's time for a change in our life,
We want nothing but to have love and lots, and I do mean lots of fun.
This diary that we have is one of a kind, I want people to know that,
U'll never read anythang like this ever again...at least not from under the South Beach sun.

Our diary talks about life, and lot from our past,
So many stories that I shouldn't even admit to one soul.
After I write, I feel like I'm taking a dip in tha Arctic Sea,
Running for a swim, even though I know it's a negative 30 degree cold.

Yet, I'm not afraid to strip off my Emporio Armani Undies for a thrill,
Even though it can be embarrassing, and u feel like, 'Am I tha only one?'
I feel like I'm living for so many people, and it's so weird,
Feel like my parents were Fun and Luv, yet sent to Foster care as a never adopted son.

Somebody has to Say Somethin'...And quit smiling Mariah and Pharrell,
I know u thinking I'm stealing u guys' song from 2000 and six.
That was my jam, but I'm on tha real tip right now,
I want this diary to be somebody's Pusha, and it's time for an updated and needed fix.

So on tonight, I have an announcement,
...'I LOVE YOU GALAXIA!!  WOOO WOOOO!!'
I luv you too, Homegirl...I do this only for you,
Meet me by tha bar after this and we'll share in a Cosmopolitan Egg Nog Screw.

(Psst....Psst...Murmurs in tha crowd)
People, I'm talking about my new drink, not about me and her having sex.
Gotta clear up that, cuz I'm sure u read tha papers about my habits,
I talk about pouring syrup and Fruity Pebbles on a girl, then I walk down Collins getting looks so perplexed.

But...(Crowd Laughter) Stop laughing Y'all...Especially you Kevin Hart,
Hey, u and 'Bron stop talking about me every time u do a Samsung Galaxy commercial.
And next time u have a thong party, Kev, don't have security check me like I'm some terrorist,
CDs, scented candles and handcuffs...Those are the necessities in my Party bag sent over from Herschel.

It's getting late, so let me get down to tha get down,
My announcement is something that's gonna change our diary for ever.
If not, I won't get advice from that Rat Splinter again...
at least in tha Ninja Turtles cartoons he seemed to be ever so cleaver.

From here on out, my diary will be written in tha form of Poems or Poetry,
Every single post from here on out will have that form.
Have no idea how we are gonna convey our life in tha way,
Yet and still we will, and who knows this may turn into Galaxia...From Tha Love Dorm.

This, I feel, will be something never done ever before,
A real-time diary, about someone going to tha top...now using a rhyme.
You are still gonna get wild episodes, and our emotions that change daily,
And of course, we're gonna verbally give u play-by-play on our love life of beautiful dimes.

Should be fun...Whadda think Warren Buffett?
I see ya over there sitting next to tha ladies from the shows, The O.C. and  The Hills.
Trying to get that mulah, like u homie, and remember...Anythang goes on tonight,
And that's an Eye Candy investment I want in on...Did anybody see my suitcase full on one dollar bills?!!

One more thang, though...Before I let you go.
I have one other announcement to make on tonight.
Each of you have given me so much inspiration, that it ain't funny,
Speaking of which, Jenny to tha L-O was suppose 2 sing that song...but she missed her NY flight.

My other announcement is this,
And I might get teary eyed as I'm about to say this...Galaxia have no fear.
Ok...These are the final days that u are gonna be reading our life,
Matter of fact, I'm giving it until Dec. 31st, 2014...just about one more year.

The decision is gonna be based on this,
If I'm not where I want to be in terms of fame or career or luv wise, then I'm done.
Giving so much time and effort to this thang,
You have so much Galaxia insight, that u can see our face next to tha definition of Fun.

We want to be tha best...Ever.
If u were to go back to some of our entries, hopefully u get a thought of, 'This Might Be.'
So as tha Marketing Major I am, I suggest that u tell everybody you know about our diary,
Cuz u only got one more year of this...plus a few added days...to be exact...Three.

I'm gonna give u my all, write my arse off,
And make sure that we live our life as tha Star that we all are inside and out.
U guys have giving me so much positive energy that it's crazy,
That reminds me Energizer Batteries promised me some free Wall Street Stock.

Spread tha word, cuz u are gonna be witnessing something special,
We will make sure that the entire Galaxy is a part of this...and it won't be whack.
If u don't like what u read, hear or how we live then just call up my operators,
They are standing by right now...And we'll give u ur money back.

This is a celebration on tonight, so crank it up,
And let's party like it's 1999 up in this bizzle!!
This is gonna be the best times yet, for real,
I feel so good, that Love is gonna come out...every time I take a Pizzle!

Let tha Fun and Love go on,
Like to thank everybody for coming out and supporting our life.
Now it's gonna get even more interesting, so stay tuned...
Until then, I'm about to dance tha night away...
...Gurl...has anybody said, u look like my future wife!"

No, they haven't, but it's good to hear...
Galaxia give me a moment, we're on live in about 10 seconds flat...
Trust me, after this camera light dims out, we gonna party,
U have dealt with McNuggets, but have u ever tasted a juicy and plump Big Mac?

"I'll like to."  ('And in...5...4...3...2...1....')
So there you have it, another special night here on Calle Ocho road.
Galaxia has announced that his diary is gonna be nothing but poetry,
And how this is his last year...unless he reaches his Hollywood dream that he so beholds.

I usually don't give my opinion, but I got a feeling,
That this is gonna be a sight to see up close.
Matter of fact, me and tha Galaxia man are about to have a little fun,
Ladies in tha studio, make sure tonight u make a special toast.

To this night, To me getting it in Galaxia style,
And for what is gonna be a ride of lifetime.
This is Vanessa Santiago signing off,
From Galaxia's Pop Up Club...

Where all tha stars ever so beautifully shine.


Toodles!
Austino Galaxia.